The February Flop

Hey all 🙂 hope everyone is doing well! How was your Feb?

My February was a bit of a flop really but its a new month and so possibly a new flop haha. No…but seriously….Feb was a bit of a flop. I had my second Zoladex injection, which by the way was so much more painful than the first one! They have also prescribed me HRT because boy have I been getting hot flashes, all you people out there that have gone through/going through the menopause …. ya’ll need a medal ! Imma gotta do this s**t twice!!!!! So far so good with the HRT though, well…when I remember to take it lets say.

So that’s Zoladex update done, next update CHRONIC PAIN MANAGEMENT ! Finally I have been referred to this place, I tried several years ago when I was diagnosed with FND but didn’t win that one and then a few times after; in all honesty I did give up trying because I was literally being shut down, left, right and centre. I had my first appointment over the phone with a Chronis Pain Psychiatrist which was eventful to say the least; for now I am not going to go to much in to detail with some things they were thinking like its something I’ve always known deep down but what comes with it is a stigma, a label as too say which then comes judgement. To be perfectly honest with you I’m quite fed up with being judged 24/7 so I’m unsure if I am going through with certain things they have proposed. Other than that they were very helpful and again confirmed none of this pain I experience everyday is just “in my head” despite what many people think. (I’ll probably forever need to hear this because I have always been told its in my head like forever).

That’s CPM update! oh and they have also booked my next lot of appointments with them in advance and also been referred to CPM Physio with them too.

For the last 2 months I have been getting headaches everyday, they are always there and then its like a sudden smack over the head with a spade. I am able look at lights, walk around etc but the pain is just awful, it feel’s like the only way I can get rid of the headache is to bash my head against the wall; don’t panic…I have done that ! I finally got into the docs this week gone and turns out I am having cluster headaches, also have high blood pressure for the FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE !!!!!!!!! Doc is sending me for a head scan to rule out anything sinister and looks like ill be referred back to psychology. So I walked out of the docs relieved I suppose and p****d off all at the same time. Haha.

In hindsight my February Flop I suppose isn’t really a major flop….but still a flop. My Nan who lives 4hrs from me is in hospital due to her docs failing to help her on many occasions; don’t panic though she is ok and hopefully now they will be on top of the issue she has.

How’s my March going to be I wonder …… Well my car is due for its MOT this month….scary stuff. It’s started making some dodgy noises which I’m pretty sure its the brake pads/disc or both. I keep saying I should put myself on a basic mechanics course so I at least know what the issue is and not be fobbed off by sweaty people in greasy overalls !

Flopsy our rabbit turned 2 this month….well… that’s a lie really….she technically turned 2 in January at some point but we are not certain on the date exactly; so we celebrated her GOTCHA DAY as her birthday. Yes she had a cake, Yes she had a cute party hat…yes of course her sister was only there for the party food !

Of course Imma share some Pics with you….

So all in all February was a bit of a rollercoaster, there were days where I have felt really good however there was more bad days in February; health & pain wise that is! Oh and February has seen me being prescribed 2 new medicines that I have never had before one of which really sends my into orbit haha.

Lets see what March brings !

Peace Out!

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage

x

3AM THOUGHTS

Good morning you lovely bunch, hope your all doing ok and life is treating you all well.

Now, I don’t know if it’s just me, but lets just say around 3am in the morning I suddenly think of the most random things I could blog about and tell you guys, in my head at 3 in the morning I have typed it all out and erased it and started again about 10 times and then actually come up with an amazing post, to then just say to myself I’ll get the laptop out in the morning and write exactly that !!! ……. (the morning comes and well …. as you can gather I do not get said laptop out and write the amazing thing I wrote in my head the night before….#rookymistakerightthere)

I also think of other random things at stupid o’clock in the morning; things like:

• I wonder what I was doing this time 5 years ago (to which I reply to myself….exactly what your doing now you turnip !
• Or things like ……. I wonder who discovered the Giraffe and why they named it Giraffe

The brain is a fascinating complex organ…. wouldn’t you agree ?

Speaking of the brain …. how are all my fellow FND warriors doing ?

I don’t really have much update on the FND front to be honest, my symptoms are all still the same however the past 3 weeks I have noticed I do have ticks every other day, not always a major tick event though! I tend to only make sounds too rather than saying words, expect the word boom ….. yep boom … after making a tick tick sound….so it comes out as tick tick boom ! (got to laugh or ill sit there crying I suppose haha )

Does anybody else experience ticks with their FND? I’m just curios as when and why you think they started for you?

Oh…slight back track…..another thing I was thinking about the other night at stupid o’clock in the morning was: I ask you guys a lot of questions throughout my posts and also mention about you guys contacting me if you would like to etc and I suddenly thought well how on earth are you doing to do so……..so…..here is now an email address if you would like to get in contact etc. and answer the questions and other things I talk about throughout my blog if you wish too. journeywithmeFND@outlook.com

Ok….back to the previous convo…..FND has been going alright I guess for me, steady lets say. Although I did burn myself (accidentally of course) whilst pouring a cuppa the other day, (first time in ages this has happened may I add). For those that have been following this blog from the beginning you will have gathered how accident prone I am, (some of it is the FND but some of it is just pure clumsiness on my part haha) I immediately ran the cold tap on it for 20 minutes but if I’m totally honest I don’t know what stung the most…the actual burn itself or the freezing cold water gushing out of the tap onto my scorched skin ! I now how some more burn cream as I realised I didn’t have any on me (in the words of Homer Simpson … DOH).

So all in all …. FND has been perfectly fine this month (she says…whilst thinking about any other FND mishaps to tell her fellow readers).

Has FND been treating you well? do you have an interesting story you want to share with the world when it comes to FND or any other health condition?

(I try not to speak a lot about FND but it is why I started this blog I suppose)

Before I dash off I noticed on one of the groups I am on on Facebook regarding FND someone was wondering about some FND specialists centres in the UK. I thought I would share with you all this bit of useful info…..

Don’t quote me on it but I’m pretty sure you can ask your normally GP to be referred.

BRISTOL

ROSA BURDEN CENTRE, SOUTHMEAD HOSPITAL

• OverviewAt the Rosa Burden Centre we have psychiatrists, therapists and nurses with lots of experience working with patients with these symptoms.
  We have an outpatient clinic in which we carry out assessments and provide guidance. We provide outpatient psychological treatment (CBT) for suitable patient.

LONDON

WOLFSON CENTRE FOR NEUROREHABILITATION AT QUEEN MARY HOSPITAL IN ROEHAMPTON

• OverviewThe inpatient neurorehabilitation programme is based at Queen Mary’s Hospital, Roehampton as part of St George’s Hospital NHS Trust. It provides assessment and treatment for FND across a variety of inpatient and outpatient settings. We routinely diagnose patients with FND in outpatient clinics, as well as on the acute medical/neurology wards at St George’s. Patients move through our pathway receiving rehabilitation for FND either as an outpatient or after being admitted for inpatient neurorehabilitation.

LONDON

THE NATIONAL HOSPITAL FOR NEUROSURGERY AND NEUROLOGY

• OverviewThe NHNN has a long-established treatment programme for patients with FND within the Neuropsychiatry Department.
  Patients may be referred to our MDT Outpatient Clinic for assessment of suitability for treatment. The referring doctor needs to have made a positive diagnosis of FND and to have explained this to the patient. We do not provide a diagnostic service for this condition. Patients will be seen by a Neuropsychiatrist or CNS-Neuropsychiatry and one or more therapists (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Occupational Therapy or Physiotherapy).

LEEDS

NATIONAL INPATIENT CENTRE FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL MEDICINE (NICPM)

• OverviewThe National Inpatient Centre for Psychological Medicine delivers biopsychosocial holistic care for people with complex medically unexplained symptoms and physical / psychological comorbidities.

LEARN MORE

There is also quite a few OUTPATIENT centres throughout the UK. Here is the link to FND hope UK website who have all the info you need https://www.fndhope.org.uk/about-fnd-hope/fnd-hope-uk/fnd-treatment-uk/

On that note, I’m going to love you and leave you…..until next time…

Peace out !

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage

xx

How Lockdown Has Helped My FND!

Crazy to think Lockdown has actually helped in some way, yes Lockdown has been a bit boring in the sense of not being able to go to places you would normally go, meeting up with friends and family and well if your a hugger then Lockdown certainly has been a bit of a burden for you. My partner and I have spent a lot of time together throughout each of the national lockdowns we have had here in the UK, first lockdown we managed to get away for a couple of nights camping which was an adventure to say the least, we socially distanced met up with a really good friend from our season work abroad and of course we had the sun for the majority of the 1st and 2nd lockdown. Lockdown 3 has been a bit of a struggle its been winter so rain rain everyday (which never makes us feel great anyway does it? lets be honest) also its been a lot stricter this time round (yes it was needed and I 100% agree with the whole thing).

One thing Lockdown has done for me personally is my FND symptoms have been very mild and for that I am very grateful. It’s kind of made me feel “normal” again, how I was before FND hit me like a ton of bricks. I think its because I’ve not been in stressful situations, been around negative people or had people get up in my grill. I’ve not had to see family members that instantly put stress on me, not family functions that you drag your heals too….so for that I am thankful, its been so nice to not have daily falls or endless mind blanks, don’t get me wrong I have still struggled and had pain everyday but its been a different and not as exhausting.

How have you all been? any fellow FND Warriors found it the same or is it just me, like I’m not complaining but I feel like when life goes back to some kind of normality it really is going to hit me like a ton of bricks and I’m going to be completely wiped out. Pre COVID and Lockdown I used to find just an 1hr visiting people would drain me to the point nap time was my new best friend.

I have missed seeing people and going places but I have thoroughly enjoyed just time to ourselves with no unexpected guests turning up at random hours of the day, (well other than the Amazon delivery guy but that’s expected).

Here’s to a mad year of in and out of lockdown, a year of ups and downs, a year of laughter and most importantly a year of less FND pain and spending quality time with those that are in our bubbles !

Peace Out!!!

Ciao, Adidos, Bon Voyage

x

STUCK ON THE TOILET

Finally downloaded the wordpress app on my phone yay which was pretty handy for this post to be honest

Today I woke up feeling a bit blurgh (shit I knew I should of had a lay in haha). All day I have feeling a bit disorientated and I have no idea why (so annoying). Anyway other than that it’s been a pretty good day, although I imagine my other half is glad that the Space stuff is done for now I’ve kinda neglected her a bit since yesterdays launch of the Falcon 9 rocket (AMAZING), last night I dragged her out to the garden to get a glimpse of the International Space Station and of course the Crew Dragon itself ! (Remarkable) ….anyway that’s enough of space stuff….down to the stuck on the toilet business. !!!

About 10minutes ago bladder duties calls but there was only one issue, my feeling in my legs disappeared whilst sitting there and I was pretty much stuck with my pants down my legs. Oh shit I thought, how am i meant to get out of this conundrum i seem to be in. So I give my other half a shout down the stairs who then had to come rescue me 🤣🤣 honestly it is so bizarre this very rarely happens to this extreme.

Safe to say we safely monevoured me into the bedroom and onto the bed where I am now sat contemplating how I’m supposed to get myself comfy for the night.

I must say ….. FND you are all fun and games at times.

Peace Out!!

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage

Xx

Have you taking your meds yet ?

HAPPY SUNDAY !!!

Today I am going to talk about all things medication. (errrrghhh I know frustrating but sometimes we have to take them…some more than others)

Before I was diagnosed with FND doctors did not know what to do about my pain levels and I was constantly being swapped different meds. One medication I was on at the start was amitriptyline this was originally to help with my “irritable” legs especially at night…did this work….for a matter of 2 weeks yes and the doctor really couldn’t understand why on earth it stopped working, but one thing this drug did do to me was give me terrible nightmares, like I mean aweful. I then was put on Gabapentin, now this worked a treat and I would really recommend this to others who are similar to me with neurological pain. Gabapentin did help my pain in my legs as well as everywhere else, I found it helped control my symtoms I was getting. I was then moved up to a higher dosage as my body just got used to the strength I was on, and I was also put onto Oramorph because the pain was just unbearable.

I was diagnosed with FND and my pain just got worse my Gabapentin was uped another level and had to take 3 a day, I was back on amitriptyline 4 of them before I went to bed, and chuck the Oramorph into the mix. I noticed after a year my memory was poor my partner also noticed and was getting very worried so back to the docs I went where I had a memory test and epically failed. ( I knew I would). I knew that memory issues came with FND but I wasn’t prepared for it and quite honestly I am still not prepared for it now. Some days I don’t remember what I ate that morning, and when my partner says “do you remember when we was working away and this happened” I’m like no I really don’t and it’s so frustrating I don’t want to forget all the moments that have been so memorabile and my age of 26.

I became a member of FND pages and groups on Facebook and read an article about how Gabapentin after being on it for a prolonged period of time it can cause issue’s with your memory, I knew I couldn’t just stop taking Gabapentin A) becuase my pain would be excruciating and B) well your not supposed to hahaha.

My next visit to the Neurologist went pretty well and I asked about the memory issues with Gabapentin to which he said he had also read the same article and fully advised what I asked about ….. Switching from Gabapentin to Pregablin. He also said to try and get of the Oramorph for many reasons but said there is no rush as if your in pain you need to control that first. I am still currently taken Oramorph just not as much as I probably should, I try and grin and bear through the pain.

I went to doctor to enquire about Pregablin she seemed very reluctant but I stated the Neurologist said Its a good Idea and he also had wrote a letter asking for me to be changed to Pregablin. I have now been on Pregablin for about 7 months and have noticed a huge change in my memory issues. I am not saying it has cured it as I still do have issues now and again however this is all FND related and not medication related. Medication can really give you other symptoms so I strongly advised keeping an eye out and if you experience anything new just monitor it and research into it because you may just need to switch up your medication.

I am now only on 2 Pregablin and day, I also take a multi vitamin each day as I noticed this really helps with my FND. I am not on Amitryptaline and I can take Oramorph as and when I need it. It is a massive difference since the beginning of this FND journey and I am finally happy and glad to say that my FND is under as much control as I and medical proffessions can get it.  Recently I keep joking around to my partner saying im going on a medication strike…. wouldn’t that be nice….I honestly can’t remember the last time I didn’t have to take meds each day……..there are times where I think FFS not again but in the end I know I have to take them otherwise I will not be functioning. 🙂

Believe in yourself, Believe in your medical proffessions (as hard as it can be at times), Research into your condition and medications. Unsure on something ….. raise it  !!!

 

Peace out !

 

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage

xx

JUDGEMENTAL CHARACTERS !

Good evening all.

Hope life is treating you all well.

So I thought I would share with you a recent encounter whilst taking a stroll to the shop. Hang on lets back up a few hours …….

Like always FND likes to appear in many different ways and mine being on this particular day not being able to hold my own weight so crutches in the morning it was. I popped out with my partner on crutches that morning but by late afternoon/evening I didn’t need them anymore providing I took a slow walk.

So here I am around 5pm taking a walk around to the shop and some random person, whom I have no connection with nor have I ever seen in my life starts to shout at me; “What a fake…you were on crutches earlier, wait until you get a letter in the post, go get a life, I doubt if you work because your so what disabled, when actually you are perfectly fine. Look at you there is nothing wrong with you so how about do the world a favour and stop pretending”.

To be honest I was pretty shocked but alas I carried on walking because I thought to myself I shouldn’t have to explain myself. However this clearly judgemental character carried on with his opinions that he thought was facts; I couldn’t take it anymore so I turned on my heels and stated the following:

“Not every disabled person is stuck to a chair 24/7 or has to use walking aids constantly. I have a condition where it constantly changes, yes it’s a mind fuck to other people I understand that but take a step back and think how it makes me feel. I don’t enjoy having a life where one day I can walk and other days I can’t. So before you judge anyone just think about what your going to say because words can hurt and have a long lasting effect on people, so just crawl back to the rock your clearly hiding under and educate yourself on the fact that not all disabilities are visiable nor are they all bound to one aid !!!”

Safe to say this fella apologised and asked what condition I have and said that he would look into it….I couldn’t help myself…..I told him “there is a charity called FND action, GOOGLE it, and whilst your there if you can pop some money in their funds to help them with fundraising and awareness it would be appreciated”.

It was the most bazar encounter I have had. I agree with a lot of people my condition is very confusing however people don’t stop and think how it makes me feel because if your confused then I am too. It is hard living with FND because you never know how your going to wake up. My partner and I struggle to plan things because who knows how I am going to be on the day; a lot of the time we are late for events because FND has decided to show itself an hour before we are meant to be leaving.

However I keep smiling even through the sly comments here and there. I know my condition, I know its a mind bender, I know other people don’t really understand or choose to not understand…..but I keep going, I try to ignore the comments and carry on with life because this is the hand I have been dealt with and now I just got to play on.

Peace Out !!

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage

xx

Last Neurogym

HAPPY SUNDAY FOLLOWERS !!!

As you know I have been undergoing Neurophysio therapy and that has now come to an end (there goes my weekly outing haha) I was very apprehensive at the beginning because I have had numerous amounts of physio sessions in the past that have done nothing, but lets just say I was wrong about this one. I knew that Neurophysio was good for Functional Neurological Disorder and also knew that this is the therapy that I needed to get my hands on. My advise to you out there is if you have the opportunity to participate in some much needed therapy like Neurophysio then 100% you need to do it.

My very first session my therapist done some test such as how long I could stand for, how long I could stand on one leg etc, and it was poor. I say this very positively because my last session on Wednesday I topped my marks that I previously got the first time. (YAY go me ). Something as simple as standing with your eyes closed for 10 seconds without collapsing is actually a fantastic feeling; the very first time I done this I manage 2 seconds and then fell to the ground.

My balance was very poor at the start (ok its not 100% now but its a lot better), bending down to pick up a pen off the floor meant me practically inspecting the floor face down (what a fab image haha), I scored 37/58 the very first session and ended on 46/58.

I attended the Neurogym at my local Queen Alexandra Hospital, Cosham once every week with my session ranging from 30 mins to an 1 hr. Where they painful? Hell yes but were they worth it in the end? Of course they were.

Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Pexels.com

So what happens from here some of you maybe thinking? Honestly I don’t know, touch wood since moving onto pregablin my symptoms seem to have eased (to a certain point), I am still under a Neuro Psychiatrist so I am presuming I will be receiving another letter through the post soon to have another appointment with them as they are the ones who managed to get me the Neurophysio. I am waiting for CBT therapy but there is a long waiting list for that one so in the mean time is learning to control my symptoms I guess and learning to cope and live with this wonderful condition called FND (haha).

So that’s the low down on my recent fortnight.

How are you all doing/coping with what ever it is you are going through at the moment.

Stay strong beautiful people, believe in your dreams.

Peace Out !!!

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage

x

Lets talk about Job Search !!!

Statistics show a job advert will receive on average 250 resumes; and only 4 – 6 of those will actually be called for an interview. (yeah I know sucks right) No wonder it is so hard to get a job but putting that aside getting a job with having a medical condition I feel is 10X harder. People are always saying to me they can’t discriminate just because you have a medical condition…I agree they can’t discriminate but they can find a reason not to employ you.

When I was first diagnosed with FND I carried on working.

A) Because I was doing season work and I certainly was not missing out on travelling

&

B) I wasn’t going to let FND define me

I managed to do 2 seasons after being diagnosed and a bit of work back here in the UK in between and approx 2 months of work when I stopped travelling. Unfortunately my condition did deteriorate forcing me to throw myself out of the working world.

I have now been unemployed for nearly 2 years, it has been a long road to “recovery” but I am raring to get back out there into the world of work.

I know some of you maybe thinking….is this girl mad !!! (yes I am, great observation, I applaud you haha) it just gets a tad bit boring doing nothing everyday. I do have this weird knack of keeping myself busy, always finding something to do but I just feel that it isn’t enough.

Photo by slon_dot_pics on Pexels.com

So I have started job searching again (well I never stopped really) I have had 2 interviews in the space of a month but before that I had been applying and still applying for a gazillion jobs each month.

My previous work was in the Travel and Tourism industry which In all honesty that is where my passion lies. I have looked into other industries and only a couple jump out at me. I think the issue is that once a travel girl always a travel girl; so if I can just get tourism work here then I should have no problem. You would think that would be easy peasy but I am assuring you it really is not the case. Honestly I bang my head against the wall every time someone replies with “you need more travel experience” 6 YEARS SANDRA 6 YEARS. (just for the record I don’t think it was a Sandra who replied to me.)

It is hard this job hunting lark and all I can advise to anyone else in the same boat is just keep at it; as frustrating as it gets one day an employer is going to snap you straight up and you will get to where you want to be. (well that’s what I keep telling myself so worth a try  I guess)

I have had my CV checked time and time again so there is nothing wrong there, I have had numerous amounts of role play interviews and my interview skills are on point (not blowing my own trumpet) so all I can put it down to is that I am just too good to be apart of their clan haha. !

The awkward question I am now receiving in interviews is, “so why the gap in your working career” – At first I was avoiding this question but with a bit of advice I have now taken the route to just being honest and I just tell them exactly why I have not been working. “Well Sandra I unfortunately was diagnosed with a medical condition and so recovery I suppose you could call it came first” you see there head just nodding in agreement but you know in their head they are thinking “oh shit….have I just brought up a sore subject” (its great….I love it) . To be honest so far honesty has got me nowhere but thinking up of an excuse every time before was wearing thin and that wasn’t working either so worth a shot. In a recent interview (the weirdest interview I have ever had may add) I was asked at the end “Do you ever think you will get over this condition you have” ……. “WILL I EVER GET OVER IT…….NO THANK YOU MAGGIE NO THANK YOU”. I could not believe such question was asked, like how do you even answer that. “Well Maggie I don’t think I’ll ever get over one minute being able to walk or run and the next your are essentially paralysed waste down for what could be a couple of minutes to days” (I did not reply with that ladies and gentlemen as tempting as it was haha). I believe my answer to the question was “I don’t think its possible to ever get over it but then again I never thought something like this would happen to me and it did so who know life is a mystery.”

I never heard back from that job – safe to say I didn’t pass the criteria.

I will keep at it though and I am certain something will turn up in the end, what will be will be. I say it often and I am going to say it again…..Everything happens for a reason, you may not know now but only time will tell !!!!

 

Peace Out!

 

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage

xx

 

p.s: No Sandra’s or Maggie’s where actually involved in this experience I am sharing with you, they are simply just random names picked out of the hat.

 

 

What I like to call – Foreign Pain

Good Morning All !!!

Today I am going to be talking about – What I like to call – foreign pain. I guess your wondering what on earth is she talking about but stay with and you will understand, I am pretty certain of it.

Forget FND pain and shenanigans that we all feel with any condition we may have and just think about the times that you get a tooth ache.

The last couple of days I have had a banging tooth ache (yes I have seen the dentist), and whilst in that pain state I was thinking to myself why on earth am I moaning and groaning so much about this tooth when I experience high levels of pain every single day ; yet this poxy tooth is giving me jip.

So I came up with the only conclusion I can think of and after a long discussion with my better half I came up with the only way to describe the pain I am currently feeling and that is – FOREIGN PAIN.

It kinda makes sense don’t you think?

After all foreign can also mean strange/unfamiliar.

Even though I am in pain each day with FND, I simply can not cope with foreign pain, speaking of which time to take some more ibuprofen DAMN TOOTH ACHE !!!

 

How do you cope with “foreign pain” ? drop me a message you could feature in my next blog post.

 

Peace out !!!

 

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage.

 

xx

 

Backwards or Forwards?

Good morning you lovely bunch !!!

Today I’m going to share with you more about my Neurogym sessions that I must say kill me every week but it should all be worth it in the end.

Each week I have approx 1hr … (most of the time over and 1hr) with a Neurogym Therapist to help with FND. We have discovered that the muscle in my right leg is very tight so plenty of stretches is needed but also my balance is practically non-existent.

I feel that I have come a long was since falling down those stairs and being shoved from pillar to post, but at my most recent Neurogym session I felt pushed right back. I worked extremely hard to get off of the leg splint and back to walking again as “normal” as I could; so when I arrived for my next session at the gym I wasn’t expecting to be walking out with something back on my leg again.

I had Orthotics come to my session to analyse my walk and just to try to understand my symptoms a little more I suppose. If you have been following from the beginning of my blog then you will know about my right foot but for those who haven’t, I’ll fill you in. (After I fell I was unable to feel the bottom of my right foot, it started to turn inwards and there was pretty much nothing I could do about it. I was diagnosed with drop foot (eventually) and that’s where the leg splints come in.)

So yeah that crazy shit happened and I cant feel a thing, I have been so tempted to get a tattoo on the bottom of my foot but knowing my luck part way through the session my feeling will come back and Ill be in agony haha.

After watching my walk and talking to me about my condition and the shit I go through with it; she decided that I need to go back on to something. Its not exactly a splint but it will (and does) help me on days where my legs don’t have any strength to pick up my foot, so rather than it dragging behind me this gadget picks up my foot without me realising. (quite clever really).

 

As you can imagine I feel as though I have gone backwards not forwards but at least I don’t need to wear it all the time like before. My Neuro Therapist insisted I am not going backwards I am just aiding myself to go forwards that further more but to me I feel like I did 3 years ago when they first took my leg back out of that cast and straight into a plastic leg splint.

 

The Neurogym session are good but they really do take all the energy I have for that day and most of the time I come home and go to sleep because

A) I am shattered

And

B) I am in agony

I know what your thinking shouldn’t these sessions be helping you not giving you more pain. Well I know where your coming from and to be honest I thought exactly the same thing but I have improved and it is working to a certain extent. My balance is still piss poor but not looking at the ground when I’m walking is coming on really well and the amount of time I can exercise for has increased from 1min per activity to 2min. (yay go me, Olympics next year haha )

If your out and about and you see me with this gadget on my foot then you know its a bad day.

As much as I feel like having this i’m going backwards, in time i will be going forwards because of it. (I keep telling myself).

 

Peace Out.

Ciao, Adios, Bon Voyage.

 

Xx